Why do I feel invisible since becoming a mom?

Question from Sophie D., 30, UK. Mom of 1-year-old twins.

I get it. You’re pouring every ounce of yourself into your baby—nurturing, loving, and caring—but somehow, it feels like no one sees you. You’re working so hard, but there’s no applause, no acknowledgment, and it can leave you feeling invisible.

I’ve been there. After having my twins, I often felt like a milk machine in oversized clothes, just getting through the motions. I used to look in the mirror and wonder where I went. It wasn’t just the physical changes—it was this deep, emotional sense of being overlooked. Everyone was focused on the babies, and I was, well, just their mom. No longer the woman I used to be, just someone keeping everything together.

Here’s the thing: You are doing the most important work. And just because no one is saying it doesn’t mean it’s not true. You deserve to be seen, too.

What helped me break out of that funk was making small, intentional choices for myself. It started with something simple, like wearing a nursing bra that felt soft, supportive, and comfortable. The kind of bra that didn’t make me feel like I was sacrificing my well-being for the sake of practicality. The first time I put it on, I actually felt like me again. It was a tiny but powerful “me again” moment that changed everything. It wasn’t about being perfect; it was about recognizing that I was still worthy of comfort, dignity, and even a little joy.

I realized that by taking small steps to honor myself, I could feel seen—not just by others, but by myself. And that’s when I started Bloom & Heal—a reminder to all of us that we deserve more than just surviving motherhood. We deserve to thrive, to feel beautiful, and to be seen for everything we are. ❤️

Love,
Lina P.