Everything is sold as a "miracle product" but it's all garbage or not really needed. What's the one product you couldn't live without?

Question from Mara K., 37, Portland, U.S. Mom to a 4-week-old baby girl, Renée. 

Sarah is a first-time mom to a 4-week-old baby girl. She spent months researching baby must-haves, only to feel overwhelmed by influencer lists and “must-buy” ads. Now that her baby’s here, half the gadgets she thought would change her life are sitting unused while she questions her instincts.

Mama, 

When I was pregnant with my twins, I built this enormous checklist — everything from a white-noise machine shaped like a womb to a wipes warmer that promised to “soothe sensitive skin.” I convinced myself I needed it all to be a good mom. Waterproof diaper bags, organic cotton baby carriers, linen-lined strollers, eco-friendly pacifiers, reusable cloth diapers, portable bottle warmers… you name it, I bought it or obsessed over it in a late-night rabbit hole.

And yet? When the twins came, none of it made me feel more prepared.

Most of it felt like clutter — expensive clutter. And even worse, it left me feeling like a failure for not loving or even using half of it. I remember standing in my nursery, surrounded by high-end “must-haves,” thinking: Is it just me? Am I the only one who doesn’t get why this $300 carrier is supposedly life-changing?

You’re not alone, and no, it’s not just you.

The truth is, the new mom market is a goldmine — and a minefield. Brands know we’re vulnerable. They know we’re tired, anxious, and desperate to do things “right.” So they sell us magic. And when the magic doesn’t work? We blame ourselves.

But here’s what I’ve learned: most of what you “need” as a new mom isn’t something you buy — it’s something you build.

• You need support.
• You need rest.
• You need time to learn your baby without the noise of 10 different TikTok mom-hacks blaring in your head.
• You need simple, functional baby products that actually fit your lifestyle — not just someone else’s aesthetic.

I’ve cried over diaper bags that didn’t solve anything. I’ve panicked because my bottle warmer didn’t fit a specific brand. And I’ve also fed my babies room-temp bottles with one arm while using the other to snuggle a toddler, and guess what? They were just fine.

Here’s what I always tell new moms now:

• Start small.
• Buy only the basics.
• Give yourself permission to adjust later.
• And remember: “essential” doesn’t mean expensive.

You’re not behind. You’re not dumb for questioning what you were sold. You're becoming the expert on your baby — and that matters more than any miracle product ever will.

Love,
Lina P.