The Link Between Breastfeeding & Postpartum Depression

No one tells you how emotional breastfeeding can be. Not just sweet emotional—I'm talking rage, tears, pressure, guilt. The whole, raw swirl of it.

After my twins were born, I expected breastfeeding to be bonding. Healing. Natural. And sometimes it was. But sometimes, it felt like a trap—like every feed chipped away at something tender inside me.

It wasn’t until a lactation consultant gently asked, “How are you feeling?” that I realized what I was battling: postpartum depression, tangled up in my feeding experience.

If you’re reading this through tired eyes and a tired heart, wondering why breastfeeding feels so heavy—this post is for you.

Let’s gently untangle the link between breastfeeding and postpartum depression.

How Breastfeeding Affects Your Mental Health

Breastfeeding impacts your brain and body in powerful ways. Some of these changes can help protect your mental health. Others… not so much.

The Emotional Highs

• Oxytocin surge: This “love hormone” is released during letdowns and helps you bond with your baby.
• Prolactin: Encourages relaxation and nurturing feelings.
• Skin-to-skin closeness: Can reduce cortisol (stress) levels for both mom and baby.

These hormones are part of why breastfeeding can feel calming, even sacred, for some.

The Emotional Lows

But for many moms, especially those already vulnerable to anxiety or depression, breastfeeding can trigger:

• Feelings of isolation (especially if you're the only one feeding the baby)
• Sleep deprivation, especially with cluster feeding
• Touch overload or body resentment
• Guilt when breastfeeding is painful or not going “right”
• D-MER (Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex), a lesser-known condition that causes sudden sadness, anxiety, or irritability right before a letdown

And when the pressure to breastfeed "perfectly" collides with postpartum hormones? It can spiral fast.

Breastfeeding Can Trigger or Buffer PPD — Sometimes Both

Research shows that breastfeeding is associated with lower rates of postpartum depression—but only if breastfeeding is going well.

If you’re struggling—experiencing pain, latch issues, or feelings of resentment—breastfeeding can actually increase the risk or intensity of PPD.

This doesn’t mean breastfeeding is bad. It means your experience of it matters. What’s protective is:

• Being well-supported
• Feeding without constant pain or shame
• Having flexibility and freedom in how you feed

That’s where the real mental health buffer lives—not in breastmilk itself.

What to Do If Breastfeeding Is Hurting Your Mental Health

Here’s the truth you may need permission to hear: If breastfeeding is damaging your mental health, it’s okay to shift, supplement, or stop.

Feeding your baby shouldn’t cost you your well-being.

Gentle steps you can take:

• Talk to a mental health professional (PPD is treatable)
• Work with a lactation consultant to ease physical discomfort or find alternatives
• Consider combo feeding to give yourself breathing room
• Let go of the idea that there's one “right” way to be a good mom
• Ask for help, even if it's just someone to hold the baby while you shower

And wear clothes that support—not constrict—you. A comfortable, nursing bra that’s soft, wire-free, and easy to unclip (like Bloom & Heal’s) can make those long days feel less suffocating.

A Note from a Mom Who’s Been There

I wanted to exclusively breastfeed so badly, I ignored how much it was hurting me. I cried in the dark while nursing. I resented my husband for sleeping. I felt like my body wasn’t mine anymore.

But the moment I prioritized my mental health and fed my girls in a way that worked for us? Everything softened.

You deserve softness, too.

FAQs

Q: Can breastfeeding cause postpartum depression?
A: Not directly, but difficult breastfeeding experiences can contribute to emotional distress and increase PPD risk—especially if you're in pain or feeling unsupported.

Q: What is D-MER and how do I know if I have it?
A: Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex causes a wave of sadness, irritability, or anxiety right before milk letdown. It’s hormonal and not your fault. If it happens consistently, talk to a lactation consultant or provider.

Q: Should I stop breastfeeding if I have postpartum depression?
A: Not necessarily. But if breastfeeding is making your mental health worse, it's okay to explore other options—including mixed feeding or weaning. Your well-being matters.

Q: How can I make breastfeeding feel less overwhelming?
A: Try feeding in comfy clothes, use a nursing bra with one-hand clips, ask for help with burping/changing the baby, and take breaks when possible. Mental health support is just as crucial as feeding tips.

Q: What’s the best kind of bra for moms navigating emotional or sensory overwhelm?
A: Choose one that’s soft, breathable, and wire-free—something like Bloom & Heal’s signature bra. When your chest is sore or overstimulated, comfort makes all the difference.